🌿 Social Anxiety: My Quiet Battle and the Strength It Gave Me __ By Lilia Luby

     

       There’s a quiet kind of struggle that lives in the shadows of conversation. It hides behind polite smiles, hesitant laughter, and the constant hum of internal doubt. This is social anxiety — not simply “being shy,” but a persistent, often exhausting inner dialogue that questions everything we say, do, or don’t do.

I’m Lilia Luby, and like many others, I’ve carried this invisible weight for years. And for a long time, I didn’t know how to talk about it — until I realized that talking about it might actually be part of the healing.

---

What Social Anxiety Really Feels Like for me

Imagine being in a room full of people and feeling like your every move is under a microscope — even when no one is really looking. Social anxiety makes everyday moments — ordering coffee, joining a group chat, or speaking up in a meeting — feel like high-stakes performances.

It’s not about lacking confidence. It’s about an overactive inner critic that rarely rests.

At first, I thought I was just “too sensitive” or “awkward.” I forced myself into situations that left me emotionally drained, thinking that pushing through the fear would make it disappear.

But healing began when I stopped blaming myself — and started understanding myself. I began to see my social anxiety not as a flaw, but as a signal. It was pointing me toward a need: for gentleness, self-respect, and space to grow at my own pace.

---

What Helped Me (And Might Help You)

Everyone’s journey is different, but here are a few gentle tools that helped me feel more grounded:

❤Self-awareness without judgment

I started journaling after social interactions — not to criticize myself, but to understand what triggered my discomfort.

❤Small steps, big wins

Saying “hi” to a neighbor, asking a question in class, or simply not over-apologizing — I learned to celebrate the small victories.

❤Mindful breathing

When I felt overwhelmed, I’d return to my breath. Simple, quiet, powerful.

❤Selective socializing

I stopped forcing connections and started seeking environments where I felt safe and seen — even if that meant fewer people, but deeper bonds.

❤Therapy & community

Talking to a therapist helped me unravel old patterns. Connecting with others who understood helped me realize: I was never really alone.

---

You’re Not a Problem to Fix

If you’re reading this and it feels familiar — I want you to know this: you are not broken. Social anxiety doesn’t define your worth, your intelligence, or your potential.

Sometimes, the people who feel the most are the ones who have the most to offer. You might not be the loudest voice in the room, but that doesn’t mean your voice doesn’t matter.

---

Final Words from Me, Lilia

I don’t write this as someone who has it all figured out, but as someone who’s learning to be brave — one conversation at a time.

If social anxiety is part of your story too, I see you. And I promise, there’s strength in your softness.

Until next time,

Lilia Luby 💜